It's already second day of school and my engine has not started. I have the feeling for work but I laziness came to me when I'm doing. I don't want the same thing to happen last sem, I need to do well! I need to! I don't want to compete with anyone but you only get stronger during competition! Recently, the mindset of studying design is swaying here and there. I don't know if I should carry on. Not because i'm not interested or giving up but I fear for my future. This is not a stable job. It's either I go high up or going to the very bottom. Why must we fear so much for our future? Why must we fight so much for our life. I don't like this at all. But you only get happiness when you have a good future. This is the world that I'm brought up with. We enjoyed all the comfort here but at the same time, we need to work harder. Unlike other country, they are living in such a slow pace. They are happy but they do not enjoy what we enjoyed. This is just LIFE~

These few days I couldnt contact him because they were banned for using phone. Sigh. Days without meeting, days without seeing, days without talking and days without knowing. The feeling of waiting is so much terrible than being single. Being single, you do not have someone for you to wait, for you to worry and for you to love. Whereas, you can't stop thinking when you are waiting. I get so emotional at times but trust me, I will not give up because of this. Because, I'm waiting for someone who worth my time! Weekends became something that i look forward to everyday. I'm not the only one who is doing the waiting. It's unfair for me to say I'm the only one who is experiencing the feeling of waiting. I believe he's looking forward to his weekends too as it is the only time he gets his freedom!

I wanted it back so much but I know it's no longer with me

I can sense it long ago