Cny is coming to an end soon. Although people nowadays dont really celebrate it, my cny really lasts for a total of 15 days. We enjoy the 15 days of Cny to the fullest. Personally, I felt that cny has loss it's meaning. It's no longer about giving blessings to one another. To me, it has become gambling sessions. Everywhere i go, every house I visited, I never failed to gamble. Blackjack, mahjong, whatever cards game, i'm always there. Money in and out, happy of winning and heartache of losing. But who cares, I had fun. This year was a little different. It was the first time I bring my boyfriend to my relatives. It was rather awkward for us as it was our first time. But after a few time, it was ok for us. This year, I have someone to spend my cny with <3 Too bad, he only gets to enjoy 3 days of it!

Because of cny, it leads me to a never ending workload. From the first day of this week, i have been clearing my work one module by another. Report and Tod essay was done before cny therefore there is only editing stuff left. TOD journal was the worse as I have been procrastinating about it. But fortunately, I manage finish it in a day! efficient much! Matech has always been a weekly work and i have done it. Just that there was a few exercises that was just uploaded recently. What's worrying is my IDS project. I guess most of us have been neglecting this for dont know what reason. But right now, I'm enjoying this project I'm having. Just that I felt quite stuck at this moment.

Deardear OCS parents visiting day. Look at this guy, he's always standing straight with his uniform! What's surprising is to see my mum and his parents in the photo! I was shocked when my mum said she wants to take a look at the environment there. And his mum was ok with my mum going. I was rather worried about the awkward moment when they met. However, everything goes smoothly when they met each other. I dont need to start any topic, they carry on with theirs. At times, they were on a conversation that I cannot join. That will be good if I have the same socializing skills as my mum.

Because of the 2 weeks of confinement he's having. I miss so much! These 2 weeks have been passing so slowly that I cannot wait for sat to arrive. Ever since he went ns, weekends became so precious to us. There are couples who needs to meet every day and luckily we are both not that kind of person. Meeting on weekends for a week is needed I guess. I used to be someone who will attend to everything. But right now, situation has changed. I really hope you guys can understand the situation I am in. I know my friends around me can understand but I know there will people who think likewise. These people are those who do not put himself in my shoe. They only think for themselves.

Lesson at 8am tomorrow, seoul garden with zhengwei and larry after that. Shall sleep now. Goodnight :)

Humans are born selfish?

Yes they are.

Congratulation my dear! You got posted to what you want! Though I dont know if this is good for you and for us, I will still be supporting the choices you made. It wouldnt be easy for the next 9 months/ 5 years. Like what you said, lets enjoy the moment we have for now. Tomorrow will be the last day of your 'holiday' and I hope you enjoyed this whole week.

Having to say about this week, some things didnt go well for us. But well, we still love each other for who we are! All the best for the rest of you ns life. I will do whatever I can to love you, to stay with you and spending all my life with you. Hang on :)

Today brings back the past. These feelings seems to be so familiar. That feelings that we have forsaken for so long has came back to us. The way we acted, the way we felt and the way it is now. I've tried to be okay but no use at all. Things fall back to where it is. I know I started all these and I wish I didnt bring it out. Yes, we should pour everything out but now I've learn that, everyone has their own secret. If only i continue to keep it inside, this would not happen. I hate this feelings, I hate let out my tears. I told myself I shouldnt affect anyone with my own problem but I failed to do it today. I couldnt control it anymore. Whenever I saw message, my heart sank, my eyes feel so sour and tears just flow out. I dont know what to do or say anymore. I couldnt describe the feeling now. I just wish to be alone so that I dont have to control myself or worried if anyone will be affected by me..

Sometimes there are feelings that I find it so hard to control. I felt so uneasy, just so uneasy that I couldnt stop thinking. There's no any other wild thoughts but just the feelings that is controlling me. I dont want to behave like this but I really tried hard to control. Maybe it's just her that make me feeling insecure. Why her? No idea..

No school today instead we have e-learning to do. I felt so lazy to do it as it is really boring ttm! Trying my best to finish up as many work as I can to keep my weekends free. I want to enjoy it freely without thinking of any work. Yes, I'm back to that routine. The new project brief was to design a toilet. It's definitely easy as we got a direction to it. But because of this, it becomes harder. I wanted mine to be different from anyone else. But different can a toilet be and what's worse is that the site is in sp. However, we got back the lecturer we still have, kelly. It is the most motivated thing for me before I looked at the project brief. With Cindy and kelly as our lecturer, its the best combination! Having to say so, I need to work harder! I agree with what stephanie blogged about finishing tod essay! A big stone is removed yea (Y)! Going back to school to run! Need to start exercising before getting lazier! bye! :)

Merry Xmas

Happy New Year

&lastly

Happy 15months <3

2011 has come to an end and it is filled up with lots of memories in the entire year. There is so many changes in me, so many changes in my life and so many things happen. 15months of relationship with my dear boyfriend, I felt so bliss. Knowing someone who is always there for you, always loving you and always giving in to you is being so fortunate. I know I’m not an easy girl and with that short-tempered, he put it through. I had so much to say about how happy I have him but I couldn’t describe it all out. Thanks for being there for me. Thanks for your patience. Thanks for living in my life. Thanks for everything. You added colours to my life.

Thanks you!

I love you my dear!